Feeding the Weary Soul
Hello and welcome, Weary Soul. Thank you for being here. My name is Sydney and I am a dietitian in Seattle, WA. Lately the world feels heavy. I know I am not the only one feeling the strain. Is your soul weary, too?
It makes sense to feel strong feelings of distress when violent, racist, abusive people are making decisions for the collective. It is distressing that people, mostly intensely people of color, are experiencing the consequences. As abuses of power continue, I notice my system contract.
Eating can feel tricky in distressing times, and I know that eating is an important part of survival, endurance and resistance. It is always important that you are fed. And it is especially important now.
Let’s begin with education on why it can be hard to eat when your soul is weary. I will then share a capacity framework to approach eating at this time. Finally we will explore some practical ideas to care for yourself and your community depending on your capacity.
Why it can be hard to eat
Hunger Shutdown: When emotions like sadness, anger, and fear are present in the body, stress hormones are released. Your system mobilizes energy to respond to the perceived distress accordingly. Energy is diverted away from the digestive processes. Essentially, your body switches into high alert to respond to potential threats, and sidelines digestion for later when safety returns. Gastric motility, or the movement of food through your intestines, slows. This means that food stays in the stomach longer which can create the sensation of fullness and bloating.
“My stomach is in knots” happens when your body is stressed.
GI Distress: When distress is present, the body prepares to jump into action. For this reason, blood is diverted away from your stomach and intestines and towards your heart, muscles and lungs. This can cause abdominal pain and nausea. In addition, distress may contribute to muscular bracing which can make your stomach feel tense, anxious and upset. Diarrhea may also be present when you feel afraid and anxious, as the large intestine may receive the signal to evacuate when stress hormones cortisol and adrenaline circulate.
Executive Functioning is Extra Hard: Executive functioning can go down the drain when distress is present. Planning, creating a list, ordering food, shopping for food, storing said food, cooking, and cleaning up involves a great deal of executive function. The ability to focus and take action on all the logistics of food and eating decreases when overwhelmed and distressed, making it harder to get meals on the table.
Existential Despair: “What is the point of eating anyway?” If this kind of apathetic malaise has washed over you today, I send you deep care. Despair and stress can shut us down not only physically, but also emotionally. And the way you feel certainly impacts your experience of feeding yourself. For some distress makes eating unappealing, and for others distress may lead to stress eating or binging. If possible, I recommend sharing these feelings with a trusted loved one or therapist, and/or seeking out community grief spaces.
Capacity Framework
Capacity is the amount of energy/ time/ effort you have available. Where is your capacity at right now in relation to food and nutrition?
On the Floor: Your capacity is beyond low. You feel exhausted and it is hard to get through the basic tasks of the day like showering and keeping up with dishes. Getting prepared foods or snacking feels most accessible.
Low: You are able to keep the kitchen clear and clean, but cooking every day seems overwhelming. You may be leaning into prepared or partly prepared foods, or takeout. You have energy to make a simple recipe every so often.
Moderate: You feel energy for grocery shopping and food prep. Cooking feels more consistently possible. When you do cook, you choose recipes that are known, or that don’t feel like a stretch to put together.
Abundant: Preparing food feels easeful and even enjoyable. You have capacity to try new or more elaborate recipes and flavors, and to cook from scratch more often if you choose to. You have the energy to do specialty cooking like baking, or creating a menu to host.
Meet the moment
Community care is a powerful way to create endurance. Actively engaging with community care in the realm of nutrition can look like offering to others when you have capacity to help, and asking to receive when it feels hard to feed yourself.
If you have no or low capacity…
Ask for help. “Hey, I’m having trouble feeding myself right now. ___________ would really help me eat enough. Do you have any capacity to do that with/for me?”
Lean into premade. Any way to get food into the body is a good way when capacity is low, whether that is takeout or prepared foods from the grocery store. As best as possible, have gentleness for yourself and drop judgements about eating prepared foods.
Lean into community support. Are there community meals or events with food that you could attend in your area?
If you have capacity to spare…
Check in on your friends and loved ones. “How has eating been for you lately? Is there anything I can do to support your eating at this time?”
Offer to cook for someone you love.
Offer to help with dishes or grocery shopping.
Cook for community gatherings.
Volunteer at a soup kitchen or food bank.
Stock a neighborhood food pantry with food.
If food feels hard right now, please remember that it will not feel this way forever. This may be a time to simply survive. Trust that capacity changes week to week, season to season. It is likely that you will be able to enjoy food and cooking again in the future.
If you would benefit from additional food and eating support at this time, I am here to help. Please reach out to schedule a free consult. Sending warmth and encouragement to you.
In solidarity,
Sydney
Meet the Author
Sydney Carroll is a dietitian based in Seattle, WA. They support people who are healing from eating disorders, disordered eating, and body image shame.
